Yamazaki Distillery – Social Engineering

Without the proper hierarchy intact, we were lawless, unguided spirits with heart and courage unmatched.  No restrictions on a shogun with the exception of the honor of samurai guidelines, left to our own free will under a puppet leadership, a dangerous concoction.

We knew the life and this was it.  Born into a preexisting feudal system known as life, although thought to be free, we didn’t realize that we were caged and physically isolated on an island, topped off by a glass ceiling.  I thought that this was it, everywhere was the same, all neighborhoods were the same, all childhoods were equal – same thing, various places, only difference was the location.

Although the cage was not ours, we fought outsiders to preserve our enclave’s image and way of life.  With an erection of battle ships at our borders, combined with governmental resources being handed down in minuscule amounts, sacrificial offerings atop of ziggurats geared towards appeasing.  Polytheistic survival strategies for the scraps that were donated to us from deities in the natural world.

Praying – perverted vocal hymns, misdirected meditation with the absence of action, or perhaps the implementation of the passive action of praying, the drums were stripped, the rhythm stopped and paralysis set itself upon the movement.    The fists were strong, yet all efforts to preserve land that was stolen were sabotaged – gentrification was inevitable – trick or treaties.

Some went against the grain, trying to enhance their physical abilities, attempting beautification in the fashion of a peacock, flaunting, attraction, deception, and aspirations to fly through the jungles untouched.  Resistance from both sides of the fence, against those that expanded their mental capabilities, skepticism of intent.  SWOT assessment, permitted to assimilate into the mainstream, becoming part of the herd, abandoning the ideology of infiltration, but never fully accepted by the aggressors.

Isolated where the gutters collect what they can from the dirt, the curb, the corner.  The corner of the city named in its native tongue “the angels” where outsiders perceive a positive connotation, overlooking the fact that light bearer also maintained this title.  Therefore, there must be preference…preference for some to receive disparate treatment.

We were sick, yet never diagnosed – a mutation was injected into our genealogy that were designed to  be vaccines, preventing our uncivil ways from once again manifesting themselves.  Hellen Keller was fortunate, she had Anne Sullivan, however we have no voice to be heard, no sympathizers, nor eyes to behold the systematic illnesses that were forced upon us.

The result – unable to trust those closest to us in proximity, therefore subsequently unable to trust those from afar in which in a place where we were constructed.  Respect, earned through tribulation.  Tribulation determined by hardship, hardship determined by economic status.  A unique bond for love, grounded  love through respect.  Never forget that we were genetically engineered to be superior before modern stem cell and DNA experiments, our current existence is testament to their success.




IG – King Block Dean












































































Safe Bubbles & Malt


Located in Hong Kong, this bar can easily be overlooked from a Taxi’s window, however, if one happens to be walking up the street, the entrance is extremely noticeable.  The large iconic “bank vault” style lock, signals that one has arrived at the safe.


The exterior décor is extremely suitable for this location, given the fact that its interior houses hundred of thousands of dollars worth of liquid gold (literally).  The expressions at this establishment range from simple Japanese and Scottish aged statements (discontinued 10 years) on up to the extremely rare and well sought expressions that are typically only found at auctions (closed distilleries).

Although it is a very small location, it has made excellent use of the space available, minimalistic Asian style bar, with presentation and technology at its core.  The evenings that I went, the atmosphere is extremely dimly lit.  As one enters, immediately in front of the door is the bar that gives way to high ceilings, with the mixologist’s ingredients being attained by modality of a ladder (similar to how books are archived in a library or bookstore).

At the bar, there iPads available that maintain an inventory of every drink in this establishment.  Although I have experienced this at several restaurants with their wine menus, i must admit that this is the first time encountering this at a bar.  One could potentially spend at least 30 minutes or an hour entertained by the depth of the offerings, with the staff being able to expand and compliment any further explanations that maybe required.


To the left of the entrance, encased in series of sliding glass doors are the “safes” or the vaults that contains over 600 expressions of extremely whisky.   Being the main showcase and attraction for this bar, the bottles produce an ancient attraction more so paralleling a museum than a bar, with the well-educated staff being its curators.


In comparison to Taiwan, the prices here are extremely expensive (but this strain could also easily be attributed to my humble income), however on this island, set afloat by hedging and futures, one might find the “offering vs price” perfectly acceptable.


King Block Dean 


Miyagikyo Distillery – Domestic Violence


Reared in a house of excessive alcohol consumption that eventually turned to cocaine, prompted from depression and lack of confidence derived from a world that was destined to have us in servitude.  Opposition to the aggressors – defenders of the kingdom in Chess, melanin encoded in genes , extra terrestrials, solar powered by the sun, yet blinded – living in the dark – carbon, neutrons and protons God’s number that has been perverted.


Gazing at the stars, Milky way dreams deferred, finding inspiration for artistic work in the lowliest of places, intently listening to the street: ghettos, bars, captivated by the stories of gangsters and prostitutes, gravitational pull, eventually being transported to a new galaxy through a portal similar to a star losing its energy and eventual luster in a black hole.

The astronaut that ventured well beyond the countryside, and in avertedly brought the darkness home to where he rests.  An alien that became a functional chameleon, unrecognizable to the residents of his castle after ascending from the lair where the bottom dwellers feel confident.


A liquid that metamorphosed  Mr. Hyde into the Dr. – spirits that caused the household to become petrified, scattering at night, only to reconvene during his height of his hibernation.  Outbursts that were short sighted:  foaming of the mouth, protruding veins, sewage drain scented, the howl of the beast, the destruction of matter, irrational jibberish….Generational, long lasting implications in the offspring:  isolation, loss of confidence, bed wetting, internalized anger, thoughts of suicide….symptoms of mental abuse.


Self preservation led to premature ejecting from the nest, becoming his own explorer, venturing as far as the national border would carry him.  After years of circumventing and evading confrontation, he was on his own accord in the wilderness.  Physically removed, transporting transmitted demons that have mutated within his own being – S. Weaver.


Tolerance was built, however prolonged exposure to highly rectified spirits allowed these spirits to manifest themselves.  In the dream realm, suppression of past events and experiences would become reflective reality, and I was forced to confront them.  Intrinsic explorations that led to revelations, unrecognized internal bleeding from the heart – a black hole with no surgeon.



Joint ventures, business proposals, arranged marriages, learn and leave – a process repeated and transplanted from coast to coast to country to country that assisted in the evolutionary process.  Prior to the magnetic junction of polar cells – cold attraction, hot lubricated friction and sparks… a big bang producing universal life.



Self restraint within the psyche altered the genealogy, creating an antibody in the system that has overridden the primitive urges – mind over matter.  However, being exposed to elements of various geographic locations, pollen, dust and living organisms have become a trigger for violent allergic reactions.



An igloo of ice, encasing a warm heart with menstrual blood bringing homoeostasis well below 96 degrees.  The room temperature varies with mood swings, the elevation of a child whose legs swing to and fro, adrenaline at the highest points, and fear at the lowest.  The lowest are points in new galaxies through portals similar to a star losing its energy and eventual luster in a black hole.



Returning to the essence of energy for the purpose of detoxification similar to a plant converting rays through the processing photosynthesis converting fumes to breathable gas.  Maturation, attempting to return to my rectified universal format, a composite of star dust – 6 neutrons, 6 protons and 6 electrons.














King Block Dean































































Whisky Live – Manila – The Art of Whisky

P1150525String theory, a harp that evokes emotion within the known senses.  A lyre that connects all creatures that have ever existed, vibrations and solids between the gaps in life.  Views beheld, melodic noises, distinct ingestion, pleasurable aromas, the medium of varied surfaces – Sight, sound, taste, smell, touch, expressed in a unique multitude only to be pacified as preference, however, in its implicit essence, should be more accurately labeled – singularity, encompassing, unifying, one – A.R.T. (All Rendered  Together).

Two plates, strong willed with opposing forces, came together and formed a plain for existence: paint with oil, Kammerdian soil and water, bronze against stone – canvasses, sculptures, decorative ornaments.


Destructive, eruptive forces, created a hostile environment that, with extended time, would become a peaceful utopia, one of the most coveted natural resources sought, another medium for creative expression – the land.

The young artisan farmer, passively mentally defeated from quarreling with Mother Earth, left his seed on an isolated tectonic plate of fertile land in the Pacific Ocean.  Scene imagined by an artist, mountains cupped by the hands of a sculptor, a blacksmith melding metallic minerals that give way to precious stones, providing protection for his growth.

The island provides all of the essential elements, contrasts and tribulations , and necessary for survival, however, the feminine and scornful personality of nature, must be balanced by the harsh, masculine nature of time to generate a timeless masterpiece.




The Gardner, a harvester which only returns every season to benchmark his seeds growth – Mother Nature – Father Time….birth, death and the resurrection of the field.

P1150352Sometimes he would disappear beneath the earth, whole harvest seasons passing without a word, at other times he would feel the warm blanket of the son on a weekly basis.  Always watching from a distance, admiring the growth of the seed’s trunk, leave, limbs and petal – blossoming into maturity.  As the farmer had grown older, the time had come to make a decision:  tend to two gardens himself or uproot the developing sapling and replant it in a field with the farmer’s other seeds – Relocate home – Stay in the Region

On the horizon, a new type of soil was being imported, the canvas of the landscape would surely change.  Turned, tilled, fertile, and comprised of  minerals and nutrients necessary for growth, it would surely usher in the natural progression of the seasons that accompany growth of a field, an industry – later mastered and viewed as a form of art.

An opportunity for Father Time to get his artisan tools, and implement skills in a new industry that would allow him to extend his presence beyond this region of the universe, and the confounds of Mother Earth, ultimately becoming a fable handed down from generation to generation by those that initially made the land fertile – unimaginable potential.

Mental and physical preparations for a subsequent lunar cycle which is forecasted to provide an abundance of nutritious fertile land that will lead to exponential growth for a liquid deprived civilization.


King Block Dean




Backyard Jr. (Backyard XinYi)


My second encounter: I had been here before briefly by myself at the conclusion of watching My Little Pony (out with the family), so I wasn’t able to spend a long time in this location.  However, this time, it was the destination of a friend of mine which I had the honor of driving around for the night – founder of Whisky Live Manila – Johnssen.

The name, inherited as a sequel to the time honored bar Backyard, that was established by one of Taiwan’s (and the region’s) top drink expert – Steven Lin.  Knowing that I would take interest, she “allowed” me to go upstairs briefly to check it out, I stayed there a mere 30 – 35 minutes, therefore this review might not be giving it complete justice.



We arrived just before the mall was set to close and he was perplexed at the idea that the  bar would stay open later than the mall.  Coming up the escalator to the third floor (my first time, the mall was closed, but I was able to take the elevator up), we easily found the location of the bar at the end of the mall, and I was slightly impressed that it could manage to consume this much space, (not because of the amount of space, but rather, because I know that the opposite end of the mall is occupied by Cartier, Prada, Rolex and stores of this nature – therefore the rent must be expensive to sustain).


Approaching this establishment from the outside, there is a large panorama window with a deep tint, that spans the entrance side of the wall with a series of Mortlarch pot stills located on the interior.  The tint on the window, combined with the lights in the interior of the mall, provide a perfect discrete nature for the occupants inside.


This place conceals over 2,000 various expressions of spirits from around the world, that could be adds to the atmosphere, but could also be slightly overwhelming for a novice.


The staff is extremely knowledgeable and professional, conducting themselves and customers with the most respect, speaking both Chinese and English.  This place is definitely, tailored to a specific crowd; those adults aspiring to taste various styles of whisky, those that gathered to enjoy a slightly luxurious social spot, or those merely stepping out for a date with the underling theme hinting towards upscale exclusivity.

Stepping inside, there is a wall of alcohol enclosed in gated cabinets to the left. and the bar is located directly opposite = of the entrance, spanning 3/4 the length of the room.  Behind the bar there is a large window, concealed by hundreds (if not thousands) of bottles of alcohol.  In front of the wood grained bar, there are the standard bar stools (where customers are able to sit and be educated about the bar’s offerings).

Just past the entrance, immediately to the right, there is a series of leather couches and tables, extremely suitable for long captivating conversations with an atmosphere that ushers in comfort, making it very easy for hours to go unnoticed.  In the middle of the room there is a support beam that is decorated with photographs and a wooden art installation.


Although the ceiling is decorated with anywhere from 50 – 100 hanging light bulbs, these used to give the effect of the room being lit by stars in the nighttime sky, as opposed to illuminating the room like a photography shoot.  On the wall which is all the way to the right, there is a large flat screen television, with aptly placed mural underneath.


To be honest, if you are entertained by the television while at this location, I fear that you selected the wrong place to solicit.  I don’t imagine that they would actually show sports or any television series on the TV – although, if one were willing to pay the money, I am certain that this entire might be rented out for a specific occasion, and the TV could then potentially be used as a screen for a slide show or something of that nature.

Over all, the environment has a nice earthy feel, the combination of wood, and glass accented by the dim lights, with a private outdoors balcony, helps create a distinct atmosphere that has stands alone with its own personality in this domestic market.

An additional offering in this bar includes the private Mortlach tasting room camouflaged behind a functional curtain, large enough to fit 10 – 15 people easily, but yet secluded enough to feel like someone has escaped to a den in a newly renovated antique estate, complete with a replicated fireplace, worn, leather couches, matching arm chairs and a table centered in the room.


Johnssen, finding it curious that the place would be bustling for a Tuesday, late night, decided that we should proceed to our next destination (for this bar was merely a pit-stop in the first of a series that we would attempt to enjoy that evening).  Great conversation, solidifying a newly established friendship.  Taipei -> Manila connection


King Block Dean (El-Sin-Say)





4Play (Premier Location)

Although they bare the same name and logo, are located on the same street and same plot of land, their contrast is night and day.  If you are standing across the street and looking at the building, the one on the left is significantly different from the one on the right.  I was fortunate enough to visit the establishment on the left prior to the one on the right, and I am glad that I had  was lucky enough to have done it in this sequence, or else I probably wouldn’t have taken the time to visit the other.

P1040498Walking in, we were asked if we had reservations, the answer was no – didn’t know that we needed any (and as I have revisited this bar, I would suggest that one makes reservations prior to going).  We were a bit fortunate, it was a Saturday night and it was still relatively young when we arrived, around 10:30.

Stepping through the door, I was taken back by the entrance display, and old fashioned bathtub surrounded by Hendricks Gin and several other antique / vintage trinkets with just enough space for about two tables, slightly separated from the rest of the venue, but still just inclusive enough to enjoy the overall ambience (a nice spot to sit and seduce that person you plan on taking home later and putting the bar’s name to use – 4play)

As I ventured further past the threshold, it opens up into a well organized, densely populated, dimly lit room.  A food menu in large chalkboard style writing on the left hand side of the room, and exact opposite is where the artists create their work behind a fully stocked bar, complete with televisions and tool and machines I’ve never seen prior to this night.

Adjacent to the bar, there is the cash register, with what appeared to be a clock located behind it.  The digital clock I soon noticed was keeping incorrect time, over the course of the night, I came to the realization that this was a digital counter, counting the number of drinks served – very impressive numbers.







fourplay cocktailcocktail 4playWe were sat in a corner, at a high rise table, with barstool style seats.  There are no drink menus at this venue, patrons merely express the flavor profile which they like (or dislike), and the cocktails are made to order.   As is customary, I merely ordered the signature cocktail from the head bartender (which also happened to the be the owner – Alan) – essentially a surprise.  Paralleling the entire environment, the drink went well beyond satisfying the basics in evoking my sense of sight, taste and smell.

As the night progressed and the establishment became crowded with people fulfilling their reservations, we were eventually moved to the bar, whereas I was able to see these artists create their work first hand.  Although its typical to see men bartenders in this industry, my eyes were curiously drawn to the only woman behind the bar.  Her professionalism in the manner in which she executed orders and seamlessly complimented the actions of the owner clearly intrigued me (noted by the fact that she wore black gloves as if she were worked at a luxury jewelry shop).


Impressed with everything, my friend phoned a female he was talking to and when she arrived we totaled 3, at this point, we began to ponder whether this will be our final destination or should we change locations – we opted to stay.  We were moved to a table of 4, as others migrated to other destinations, where we sat and spoke until the bar closed.  Upon realizing that it was about to close and the night was still relatively young (I can literally stay at bars all night – not clubs – bars), I went to the bathroom located on the wall at the opposite end from the entrance, where as it was fully stocked with miniature take-away mouthwashes (perfect in the instance of a casual breathilyzer).

P1040402 - Copy (2)The three of us left together and walked up the street to a nearby 7/11, bought a few beers (not me) and a bottle of vodka, whereas we began to extend an invitation to the female that was with us…..


Closet Bar

P1170159Rather easy to find by the GPS and parking isn’t that difficult – of course I am always referring to a car when I mention parking.  You can check your own route for MRT or scooter, but in Taipei its never too difficult.  Basically its walking distance from the old Luxy (club Omini), not too far from the Adidas Original store, or at least on this particular night we walked there from that that location.  It is on a corner, in a back ally between two main streets, its easy to overlook because because the building itself does not stand out next to the sidewalk, but rather, it is slightly offset from the sidewalk, and there are parking spaces directly in front of the bar (although they are not designated for patrons).

Stepping into this place, there is a small podium where the greeter meets people to ensure the number of patrons to be seated.

Immediately to the left there is a stair case that leads downstairs to the bathroom which is hit up full of last goodbyes and names tagged in the stalls.

This spacious dungeon also has its own bar (albeit smaller than the one upstairs) and is well suited for larger groups of people.

From the upstairs entrance, straight ahead there is a large seating area where images are projected overhead.  At about 3pm (using a clock as location), the bar is prominently situated off-centered in the room, and to the right of the bar is a small fridge that stocks a few select beers.

Directly in front of the bar, are the majority of the seats, tables that accommodate 2 – 4 that can be pushed together to accommodate larger parties.  Behind these tables is the rear wall, that houses a few tables that are set into the wall (similar to a private cave).


The first time I arrived at this bar, I was with a few friends, one from work and another that was marketing Micthers with his guest bar tender from Hong Kong (John Ng).  I had had his signature cocktails the week before at a different venue (MOD II), but thats a story for another write up.


The second, and most recent time I visited this lounge, I was fortunate enough to meet the regular bar tender (Pei-Pei), and as we sat at the bar she greeted us in English.  She asked about my drink preference and I told her that I would take what she thinks she makes the best.  Then, I proceeded to tell her that a common friend (Paul) said to tell her hello.


That pretty much summed up the answer of what I was going to order to drink.  Of course, I went with her signature cocktail, and she used Paul’s Koval as the base.  Not to simplify the process, but I was already feeling better than good:  she ignited some sort of fragrant natural material on this wooden slab, then covered it with the tumbler I was to drink from.  After the glass filled with the smoke, she turned it over, allowing the fumes to escape as she poured the cocktail she had created moments before into its contents.  At the conclusion, she squeezed then placed an orange peel in the cup – Exquisite to say the least.



As we engaged in conversation, I asked about her favorite drink, and she asked me whether I drink wine.  “Of course, anything with alcohol content, aside from beer.”  So we discussed various styles of red and white which eventually led to fortified wines.  Whereas she pulled out a Pale Cream bottle, ironically, I had been studying this style of expression for my WSET exam I had just taken about two weeks earlier.  We drank and talked a bit more until the lights came on.


The night started off rather hectic, making stops in Tao Yuan before going to Indulge Bistro (another day another write up) to drop off some glasses, then sitting in the car, hesitant about meeting up with this coworker, or another coworker – both equal time distance away.  Opting for the initial plan, I drove to Closet (as opposed to Revolver)…now feeling relaxed and departing, I was pulled over by the police…..another day, another adventure….



Kavalan Distillery – From Ancestry to Descendant



Their immediate ancestry is rooted in ground that is composed of varied soil content; the concrete granite of Los Angeles, nestled in the alluvial plains of California and the developing nature of volcanic schist which erects Taiwan.  Limestone bedrock that was once used to make the Giza pyramids glisten in the desert sun – the foundation for commonality extracted from the motherland.

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Concluding two years of academia in the mainland, this inebriated nomadic warrior’s spirit began to reemerge – the Djin – pure essence.  Magnetic north moved, drawn south, echoing the footsteps illustrated by a mystical nymph.  Luminously stimulating my physical organs while radiantly arousing my mental capacities, blinding light, stumbling upon Formosa – the Beautiful Island, a remote destination refrained from foreign eyes.

An expedition with the bare essentials that rapidly turned into a semi-permanent relocation.  Yilan; paralleling Toby, stripped of its tribal name and land to be labeled new – Kavalan.  Ravished by the outside world, limbs broken, weak and dangling in the wind, conjuring all of its strength to remain attached to the trunk that is rooted in the soil of its heritage- remnants of being whole and uncorrupted, the  identity of its former self.

Skepticism pegged to mutual understanding.  Adoption fixed exchanged between patience and intention.  Eventually paralleling the creator – mitosis, cell replication, becoming timeless creating new generations, DNA variations and mutations – a new race of aboriginals.  Queens understand their birthrights and attachment to the land, the earth and its entirety.

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King Block Dean (El.Sin.Say)

1st and 2nd Kavalan Distillery Tour with my young Queens


The Coach and the Freshman – lessons in life.



Unaware of the professional aspect of this game, I had played recklessly as a child, adolescent, teenager and young adult.  Walking down King Blvd to the liquor store – ironically named Sunshine Market in one of the darkest areas of the city.  Enquiring those older than me to assist with getting my equipment.  Midnight walks through my new neighborhood with my closest friend, bottles bats and gloves in hand – always playing.   At Temple, off-campus, religiously at the state store, preparing for the weekends.


Always used as an escape from reality, any excuse would be suffice to hit the field, have a good time and play.  My father took this route after playing in the minor league, hurt his knee and retired into this lifestyle.  My environment dictated that I would perpetuate this cycle.

I’ve watched players before me, ushered onto the field, with various social titles, well-dressed and groomed, relished by their own cheerleaders,  only to have these same fans abandon them during their slumps; bodies worn out, retired, well past their prime from abuse trying to get back on their feet through anonymous programs.

It took decades for me to realize this was a professional industry, I turned to that channel by accident.  Realizing I had been playing this game, after several doubts and hesitation, I decided to go for try-outs to secure a spot on the varsity team, taking my name from one box with a glass ceiling and placing it in another which was as vast as the fields and vineyards on earth, only restricted by my own abilities.


I entered this athletic program about two years ago, thinking that the third season would be my final before retirement, changing focus and starting again.  The coach, articulate, yet humble, provided me with a different perspective on the same game.  The same game, that I’ve always known, with an altered view of the field, the equipment, the rules and the players.


His role, inspiration that lead to motivation, unlike others is humbly whispered from experience – a participant, a student always learning – instructor – teacher – Master of his craft, the Wine.

Understanding that this league is much different than where I came from – empty lots, broken glass, tattered fields surrounded by concrete, sprayed with numbers and names marking the potential of those that came before, with and after me.  An uneven playing field where we always practiced with the cheapest makeshift equipment, due to our ignorance and lack of foresight into the outside world.


A lottery that permits an unlimited number of tickets to be registered and entered by a single player, whereas improvement to gain an edge is permitted and commonly accepted.  Eventually hoping to be selected, the honor of having a jersey with my name – a representation of the niche within a sub-group in which I aspire to belong.  Not entering the hall of fame among the masses, but bringing the knowledge to the common man; the peoples champ, one with an ability to diversify and widen the game, bringing in more spectators and participants into every level.



Dedicated to the unknown, even if it meant just remaining at the far end of the bench, and honor to be in the presence of greatness, ill soak up as much knowledge as I can from reading play books, videos and observations.



Looking at the scrimmage lineup, practice jerseys on the field.  An all-star team at the summer camp during the off-season, before the pre-season, displaying their best talent, trying to their names known amongst the media.


I sit, eyes wide, determining my best approach, trying to familiarize myself with the field, the scent of dew on freshly cut grass, chocolate / toffee brown powdered dirt, and the wood that constitutes the composure of the bat. Reflecting on the past, my pallet tainted from years of liver turning hard working abuse.

Actions demonstrate better than books, however, the play book assists in giving me the technical knowledge to manifest my own routes…understanding the rules, I’ve created my own game. Time to take the bruises and failures that are bound to occur in the big league during each game on the way to my ultimate goal.  Time to lace up and prepare to enter the arena.


A former student that inspired, instructed, taught, and eventually mastered the skill set of the selected few.  Thank you MP, MW



TWA -Advanced Tasting Class, conducted by M.P. MW – in preparation for the J-Presence WSET diploma course – Unit 1 the following week

Robert Mondavi Vineyard – The Tree & The Sun

1st picture

In a state of depression so deep that my soul hurts, knowing that my spirit is breaking.  Fatigued, exhausted and worn out from merely existing – the monastic existence called life, struggling to live.   My own elements tearing at one another, diseased – a virus feasting on a physically healthy host from within.


center statue

Dark clouds blocking the horizon, albeit, it is known that there is a horizon that has yet to be seen.  Not faith but rather, self-manifestation of a non-existent reality.  Looking forward, looking back, then looking forward again – a vine, a noose a playground – swinging…cautious steps in crossing the street, looking forward, never forgetting to look back.  Reflections from the future, timeless traveling – from tomorrow, living in the best years today, yet feeling as if they are the worst.


Depression – a sensation that has contributed to creating the most beautiful forms of art throughout modern history.  A sensation that every human incurs, yet is never embraced.  An intricate unwanted portion of life, in its absence, we  would never truly know or have value.  An internal struggle that enhances endurance and mental stamina.  Uniquely triggered, and consequently uniquely resolved, unlike an ailment, internalized, masked, never to be seen by outsiders.

lower vats

Fiat currency, milled from the yet to develop leaves of a still young trunk – the Mastodon xylem tissue.  When the foundation is solid, the branches will spread, the leaves will come into their own, the fruit will blossom, eventually departing to create their own.  Then the soil will be nourishing, but the tree will not be as it once was from the beginning.

Unrealistically searching for a chemical solution, I found myself staring at empty bottles, consumed with locating the Djin – a spirit that could give me three wishes.

Yet never pondering what these wishes would be:

Aspirations for wealth?  Although I had never defined wealth.  Eternal life?  Yet I had never defined what form of life it would be, an existence in the scientific age: cloned, artificially birthed, alloy implanted? or Traditionally Timeless: books, poetry, art, sculptures or writing.  The latter, novels, chapters and pages, full with you…and them.

Perhaps the depression is rooted in the unknown, and being human, all is unknown, therefore the depression will never truly dissipate.  I find joy in the essence of those that contain my heart, under The Sun, shaded by The Tree.

me and her mondavi

Robert Mondavi Vineyard – Napa Valley, California

King Block Dean (ElSinSey)